Sunday, February 28, 2010

His and Her - The Second Bit

I blogged this months back.When I wrote that, I was meaning only the aspect of how feminity is not let to be shown in men. I did not realise, that many men do not want to show the feminity.

Looking at Shiva as a Master came easily to me. With that thought process, this quote underwent even more torture in my grey cells. If the Masculine Master was half woman, what are the macho men we see around?

Nature has defined certain aspects as masculine and society has amplified the gory truths behind these definitions. If physical strength was masculine, beating up a woman was a crown. If endurance was masculine (physical), then holding on baseless belief systems (useless or otherwise) was allowed (Ego). It was not a case of one man creating a rule, but of the exaltation of an entire gender. This elevation has almost given, I repeat – almost given a semi-demi ruler blanket to men.

Women were glorified and made to rescind – to make some way. It is an easier option to call her Ganga, make her sit on a pedestal, dress her in ornaments and perform austerities. In a way, I believe women were made to be worshipped. All the literature that speaks on women as Gods ( I hate the usage of Gods to people, baring this instance) are means to keep Her away from the evolution process. When you glorify someone to an unimaginable extent, make her as a statue in time – she is not allowed to grow. In my opinion, that is what has happened in this country. As a nation, we have learnt to keep the woman within doors not in the pretext of dominating her but by playing a physiological phenomenon as glorification. If physical adoration restricted authority, the emotional bondage restricted fruition of the mind. It is to be noted, that mythology and literature speak on why this practice of “shielding” was followed – it also spoke on how relevant it was. We have moved far from this “shield”, yet we continue to take solace in its relevance. This is absurdity. When we have evolved in thought, acceptance and generations to allow women to do what she wants to - we simply have to move on from the old relevance of shutting her down emotionally and psychologically.

When nature showed her intrinsic capabilities of bestowing feminine characteristics in men, it confused us. Ascribing tendencies to a gender is not under the capacities of a human. It is a law, and it has to be obeyed. It riles me every single time I see a person being typecasted for the sake of being born into it. If we only learn to accept that a gender is not a mere classification, but denotes a sense of unification with the world – our lives are bound to be better.

When a man becomes a woman, it is beautiful. I have read a semi-autobiography of actor Prakash Raj and in that, he speaks on how lovely it is to experience motherhood. He writes on how he spent his college days reaching home late and on never being questioned on why he was late. There have been days when he has not returned home as well. On all those days, he says dinner was always kept for the son who may return home. It has taken him years to feel on how the mother has felt during those evenings. To her, it did not bother that her son was late. It did not bother if he ate. What bothered was her call as a mother, to keep food for him. I do not advocate this paradigm, but the most important part to read between the lines is her nature to do what she does best, irrespective of how the receiving end is.

As a generation, we have forgotten acceptance. It could be due to the constant fight of survival, or rather upliftment. In a non-natural, self imposed cycle – moving from a defined masculine tendency (earning, working, being the head of a family etc) to a once again, defined feminine tendency ( caring, nurturing, looking attractive) is derogatory. This is the vicious cycle this entire generation is flooded with. In the earlier times, there was no such movement because it was a set rule, a defined space to live. Today, we see a lot of acceptance and a lot of movement. Yet, it has to grow.

We need to realize that there is a law which regulates us, and it is not created by anyone here. It is natural, it was, is and shall be there. Understanding the basics of where we are from and agreeing to the growth is the fundamental step towards movement. It has to happen. Either the men and women of today shall learn to adapt it gracefully and live their lives to a satisfactory experience, or they let the change pass by and look back in awe at what the world has become when they kick the buckets.

Writing this post has been one of the best ever blogging experiences.


  1. woooow, what a post! i used to write a lot about gender issues in india on my blog; then it morphed into isha experiences... i look forward to reading more of your blog :)

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  3. Thanks so much becky. I am now hooked to your blog! :-)


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