Desi Midget, yea that's me.

I didn’t realise I was a short one until I turned 24. Until I moved out of home and lived with people who were gracious enough to point it out to me. Don’t imagine me as kid – I am not. I am around the same height as Mila Kunis (ya, that’s how I want you to think) but really I am not how it looks on her.

I mean, some people know to carry anything with elegance; clearly it’s not one of my gifts. I can’t carry a tote with elegance, damn it.

Being a short girl is easy. It wasn't an issue until articles like these started making rounds. I don’t have any of those advantages. My shoe sizes are on par with tall ones. No one finds excuses to touch me unnecessarily and gets away with it. Irrespective of one’s height, if a human becomes a hippo – it shows. This brings me to think who writes articles like these. I mean, they should conduct a survey of sorts among short ones. May be, even categorise as really short ones, just –right-short ones because the problems really vary. The short Indian woman is not exactly petite – she is just vertically challenged, many times horizontally well endowed.

Anyway, I thought I will make a list of the advantages of being a short person. A real list with no out of world stuff, like shopping in kids section!

 Leg Room – This is the BIGGEST advantage I can think of. I travel on budget airlines mostly and crib if       there isn’t any leg room (wrong, I know). Seeing 6 feet men struggle with limited spaces is fun.

We don't bend – I have never bent my head to pass under low ceilings, branches, temple doors etc. 

Can sleep anywhere – My feet have never hung over a bed, ever.

Always 'young' – Ok, this is an unfair advantage. Humans tend to associate height with growing up, so for some reason I am always mistaken to be younger than I actually am. Personally, I think I look just about right but hey, no complaining on this.

Cooking is an adventure – In this house, most of my groceries are on overhead shelves. I climb up on the counter almost every day. This is exactly how it looks! Ya, laugh aloud.

I can think of one disadvantage – tall girls look better in a sari. I look like a misplaced midget wearing a sari.

Jack and Jill - The true story.

and..reasons to permanently ban English nursery rhymes from schools.

Sourced from google images. Excuse for not providing direct link, please.

Because it teaches plagiarism and lacks originality.

Whoever wrote a bunch of sad words certainly had his winds blown on me.He was probably the six-songs-all-sound-same music director's ancestor ; cause A..B..C..D alphabet song, Baa Baa Black Sheep and Twinkle Twinkle have exactly the same tune. We rather sing the original Kolaveri and dance with themoon(u). Or, just pick one of the million versions of it.

Because violence is not for three year olds.

If not A-rated, I certainly think most rhymes require parental guidance. A whole bridge collapses – and obviously,millions of people died. So, no one is worried about it and all they talk about is how to use iron and steel to build it back. Then, two poor egg shaped men fell off the wall and broke their head. Now, imagine bleeding heads, preferably the brain hanging out. Do that and immediately make those two men run around as the kings men are chasing them.

I think three year old's are enough bratty and violent already. (yes, i stamped on a laid out -lego trap)

Because it defies logic and common sense.

Why would you call something a star and immediately wonder what it is? Why would you go around a mulberry bush when it is snowing? And finally, why did you even go up the hill for a bucket (I refuse to say, pail) of water?

All the craziness apart, in reality -

Jack and Jill referred to are said to be King Louis XVI - Jack -who was beheaded (lost his crown) followed by his Queen Marie Antoinette - Jill - (who came tumbling after). Link here. You can also watch the video on it here.

This brings me to think..

Are there no Indian nursery rhymes in English? True, we did not write rhymes on beheading but did we not on anything else?

I would be interested to learn more. Do share your thoughts.

This post has been selected by Blog Adda as a Tangy Tuesday Pick!

Thank you BlogAdda!

Small Wishes. Big Hopes. Prayers.

There are times when life prepares you knowing what you need to endure – Shut up and play along. Do not get too worked up and throw disgust on yourself. Whiners are never winners.

When you earnestly believe and wish for something – it is true that life will magically align stars and make it happen. On the way, friends may become foes and love may be lost. But, when IT happens, you will know it was all worth it.

The day when a part of your world looks at you in contempt and jealousy - thank your stars for giving you folks to beat up.

When every single hour becomes hard to push and your heart is consumed by grief or pain – push yourself to study for an exam or learn swimming/car driving/roller skates.  A fear to perform will happen and it will make you a better person.

Five years from now, none of this will matter. Absolutely nothing holds that kind of gravity, except family. Be nice to them.  (if it is friends for you, lucky you!)

Pray for endurance, intelligence and strength.  It is not fair to pray for a miracle, when you are lying around in a couch bag and feeling like a rotten tomato. The god is not a hairdresser or a magician.

P.S : This post is more of a reflection, a note to self.It is not really meant to be preachery and certainly, not advice.

The Nut Case

Your and You're OR Said and Told OR There,Their and They're are very different words. They are related because it is the same language. And, that is about it.

I wont judge you. You will just lose me as a facebook friend if you continue to scribble garbage. That is it.

Some Gyaan with a Rocher

Not really on the lines of Eat Pray Love, but the above combination almost always makes anyone better. I am thankfully, no exception. Self given gyaan makes life a lot simpler. For someone like me, it is the only way to grow. I do not listen to too many people, not a trait am proud of.

Not trying to get preachy, but here is my little mental list that made things sane.

·        The first 25 years are over. There is really no way to change stuff out there. It is important one embraces the past truly to move forward.

·        At times, you should learn that some shit will be thrown on you. Even if you have not done anything for it. It is best one learns to escape it or endure it for a short while. Whatever, move on quickly. Not a consolation, but move on.

·        In context, it is important to give back – the bad stuff. None of us are even close to saints, and I am certainly learning the ropes to be a bitch in slapping back. It is not easy, especially when you have been trained, raised not to be one.

·        Live in a nice place. I am working on this one, but I have lately realized how so important it is.

So the last two days, I bought fresh stuff and cooked. I spoke with people who matter the most ( read:  present family only) and took two half days off early from work to sleep and to shop.

I will leave you with a picture clicked late last night. Even when life is filled with work, pressure and dirty keyboards – there are some stuff like these,  that makes it light and lovely!

 Enjoy the bite. Happy Days :)

Headless Chicken and Radish Aromas

Source: imgfave.com via Archana on Pinterest

The last few days are running around me. I am trying very hard to move along that pace, and repeatedly, I fall. Then as if I am two years old, I run again like a headless chicken.

There is too much to do; everyone wants a bit and piece of me at work and no one seems to want me other than at work. I hate to be wanted or to want someone. Both are dangerous.

I have realized that home sickness is by far the secret reason why people take drastic decisions. It has all potential abilities to kill a person from within. Cancer has some domestic company.

I smell radish in the air half the time. I smell vadagams inside a cab. I sniff for Sabena in my kitchen. I am missing stuff I never knew existed. Not food, but home.

The feeling is similar to how the olive oil feels in my feta cheese salad. It does not know if it has to coat the tomato, or stay away quietly expecting my fork to kindle it. I don’t know too. I need separation. To be away from where I am and what I do. I am not going to give you a disclaimer that I love my job and all that..but yes, I want that Nikoi Island place without a single man around.

Marriage is the single most defining thing in so many lives. I am mere spectator variety. By the way, the recent facebook albums surge are a pastime for many virgin girls. I have no clue when it is going to come and hit me like a bus (think PAM expression of Phoebe). When it does, I will also publicly announce it. Until then, do your head a favour and shut up. I can be very violent at times.

I totally understand if it is impossible to comment. Sorry, will find my sense and come back soon.

Mermaids on Earth

Old Post Alert : I wrote this when I was in school. I was taking some classes for kids in my apartment and had to tell stories. This particular story influenced me greatly. I had no idea, why I pulled it off this blog. Reposting it again, just for records.

Have you seen a mermaid, walk across and stand up with a smile?

This short story is inspired from Chicken Soup For the Women's Soul. I read the story about a week back, along with 25 other stories. After about 7 days which included 3 days of hectic travel - this is the only story that makes its rounds over and over again. I thought of it almost every night before I went to sleep. I have not read the story later on. So what follows, is a recollection of memory, and it certinaly would not be verbatim.The story goes like this. A group of children were playing in a church. The teacher, exhausted and tired wanted a simple game for the kids - Simple enough to be played without much instructions but enjoyable enough to keep kids occupied. She announced the group to stand in two lines - one line for angels and another for elves. The group was then asked to run around in circles, along with their line members. And the game went on. The teacher satisfied with her idea, sat back to relax and watch the kids play when one young girl tugged to her gown. She asked - "Where should the mermaids stand?". That question made all the difference.

In life, when we really have to do something different and come out of the ordinary - we all have to become a mermaid. It is everyone to be a angel or a elf, but only few who get to be a mermaid. It takes a lot to stand up, and say "I am a mermaid and I dare to be different"

There have been innumerable instances in my life, when I have done that. Sometimes, people find me crazy or weird. Other times, they find me pompous or secretive. There have been times when I have simply refused to go with the crowd and followed my inner call, or times when I have vehemently opposed the ways of angels and elves.

Lets go ahead and stand to be different. It is time we took the road less travelled - and became mermaids!

25 and counting..

As you grow and traverse through various paths in years, you expect to grow in many ways, to see people and learn or unlearn, to make some mistakes ( or many) and either learn from it or ignore it

As I turn 25, I am plainly surprised at the like minded characters I have met so far. By no means, I am trying to put them into buckets as each are one unique gem in its own worth. But, the similarity is striking and fascinating. So many tunes and shades – yet they are all being the same.

In this world I live in today, every single thing works on a business possibility.People have a value life and once their value is over, they are no longer used.They are not exactly thrown away too. They become friends on Facebook, thekinds you do not bother to "like" even if they own a Booker Prize.

I can count with one hand the number of sensible, generous and smart ( I tell you, this is a very rare combination ) I have met baring the usualsuspects of family. And to that, I add the ones with personality, spunk and attitude – it is not even a legible number to write down. The illusions we get on people and emotions as children are plainly illegible to survive in this big bad world.

Love - Oh, love is the most highly traded commodity. It merely moves from one place to another with eye glances, unspoken words and crappy internet romantic lines. It means convenience, comfort, a cushy wallet, a stable job and some basic looks. There is hardly any courage in acceptance, dignity in behaviour in most relationships. Add to it, the moral policing nazis - who take it as their birth right to comment on every single relationship change you go through. It is not exactly happy, or even appealing to one's own heart.

It is only a matter of how well you can make things happen with each other. If you succeed in making life simple, then it works. Else, it does not.

Friendship – The F word in my own dictionary. I mean, it is SO hugely abused and I will plainly walk straight with love for this story. If love says highly traded, this is the combination that gives the most pennies. A profit in getting a cup of coffee, to a free ride for a few years in others lives. And after Facebook made its way, the word merely means “anyone you see for 120 seconds or sees you for 180 seconds”. Italso means, you allow that person to access your life – past, present and future and all that you will mostly get back is a tag. Or may be, may be a like.

If you disagree with it and are lucky enough to still continue and exist in 2012 with a handful of friends, you are lucky.Lottery winning types. Even Casino types.

Parents/Relatives – Merely a visiting card to grow on. I am sick of the number of "kids" who used an uncle or a dad to get a internship, a job and a admission. It is probably remorse that I do not have high profile relatives to itch me a favor but in all honesty, people like me are glad we do not have them. It is one thing to have contacts and get information and act smartly. It is an entirely different thing to get guidance and fall back as a pillow.

I should write an entire post on the parents bit. It has irked at people like me for such a long time, and I hardly see any noise made about it. I am no judge to pass my statements and make an entire world go by it. At the same time, I am no soul to simply ride on opportunities and live with my own world in my head we well. I refuse to be that way. For, still there lies a world where such things matter. It still does.

This post by no means was written in a bad mood, or a wrong day. It is a mere culmination of how things are around every one of us. I just decided to call a spade as one.

I realize this is not the first time I feel this way; Here is another post on a similar note.

Stories to share!

The first post need not be this for a new year. But like how it goes, this is on my mind. Rather, they are on my mind. It was a totally different game before family came over. One whole year went strong and would have gone all too if only I had not known how it feels to have them here.

For a multitude of reasons, me and my mom are great buddies. So much that I am yet to met anyone who hits on that chord or laughs at a wink for an unspoken joke. She has certainly got strong influences on me, both genetically and behaviourally. Good or not, I don't know but it is not easy to miss someone at all.

I have missed people and cribbed, written poems(!) on it too but this one is way too heavy. The trains, buses and walkways are filled with them. Argh, had i known it would be this bad, I would have flown down instead.

We had a whale of time,unquestionably one of the best vacations ever. In many ways, this was the best way to end 2011. The year saw certain milestones for us. From a huge question mark on when I am going to study again to a successful convocation, from my lonely worried sleepless nights of job hunting to one helluva job I do, from a decade old unused passport to making Amma 's first ever foreign trip happen- I really should not be complaining. Yea, that way I am insatiable. I need the cake, the pie and even the cute plate it is on.

Suddenly, Singapore looks all ugly. I was all awing at the safety and beauty but as loneliness gets bad, it simply looks monotonous. May be I should switch to a better mood or just imagine driving through saidapet in my Scotty. I will instantly love this place.

Grumpy mood led me to The Brownie factory. Does no help to an oily face,but a teeny part of me still hopes chocolate makes everything better. I spent a good seven minutes going through the fourteen choices( I swear! If you are from SG, you must make it as a resolution to buy one even week) and I chose the salted caramel brownie. Such a pain my pea sized brain is to choose the only salty option when I carved some sweetness. It probably is not bad, but I kinda thought it was horrible. What a grump my mood is in!

Before the devil cribs again, I will leave this post to rest

By the way, this post is entirely typed and posted from the new iPhone ( show off, me!)

Wish you a blessed 2012!

That's the way it is

Things have a way of working out. Friends turning into non-friends and tasty morsels turning into porridge.

People are not like preserves. They almost always come with an expiry date. Or at least a 'best before' date. The sick thing is that you get so used to them, that the taste still lingers. One familiar place, a taste, a song almost instantly turns time back and leaves it static for me to jolt out of it. To top it all, you now also know that the so called people never considered you important. It pains because you also know how you treat the people you do not consider important. Oh, the pains of knowing, realizing hard stuff.

If all this was too complicated to wonder, I turn to simpler(!) stuff. Like having a good hair style - and hell, it does not work out. My hair is the most untameable element I have ever seen. Too short may not really suit me, or so I think. Long is terrible, especially with crazy fungi and sweat residing. BodyShop, FaceShop and Garnier - I would like to divorce all of you. Even the shihakai podi that worked back home makes hair feel like hay here. Its the climate, the lack of proper rest, food and all that jazz. All I need is a smart, manageable hair. And yea, I suck at maintenance and upkeep. I do not like combing, taming and spend hours bothering about it. Neither do I think it looks nice always.

As I told, I need balance. In everything - from my head to my heels. Oh, the story of my chapped heals. That's the way it is.

Till I reach there.

It is amazing of how a change in a place, change in the kind of people we meet can influence the inner person.I find a million changes in perspectives from within, and I am so not sure of how the hell it is going to change me. Waiting and watching it all unfold is going to be a experience. I can say, I am getting more philosophical, than I ever was. I am less judgemental, so dont know if that is good or bad!

Relationships have always baffled me. I think I am there, when I realize it is the wrong bus, or sometimes the wrong route itself. The detour process is painstakingly exhausting and the only way I know to go through it is to enjoy it. Cynic as it may sound, I am now chiseled enough to spare a half-tear and walk off. Just like that. I wish I could say the same to the baggage, unfortunately I carry quite some along.

I know some day, I will be there. Accepting someone, other than myself just as it is. As of today, I have super serious issues with the idea of even getting along, forget hooking up. And I am weird enough to say that, even when I am with one fantastic person. I have done that. I know.

Reflective blog, not so open for judgments now,

A quote and all the thought that went behind it.

"Shiva is the most masculine man you can ever see. And, he was half man- half woman"

The most masculine man is half a woman. I have a lot, a real lot to write on this. Now, I am off to my work and once I am done - I am editing this post, and writing on this first. It is itching now, to talk to someone about this.

One day...

I say.........

I will grow basil in my backyard.

I will feed a kitten with my hands

I will sell gulabjamuns for $$$$

I will plan a gourmet meal at a lake resort

I will run a marathon

I will shop for atleast a lakh rupees

She says.....

I will wear slippers to school.

I will write with a full pencil

I will buy a new matching shirt.

I will order and eat at a hotel

I will give chocolates to K on my birthday.

My one days never needs to arrive. Hers is pretty important to come soon. Inspired from a short conversation with a friend who smiles at me at Venkatnarayana Road signal.

Belief - To Live

Belief – The single magical word that irons out the creases of the muffled and worn out life. With innumerable instances in this crooked life of ours to point out, and times when just a single belief has straightens things out. Like raindrops that platter across the window before forming a puddle, there are drops and specks of beliefs that form a puddle of emotions in us. Like a stone forming ripples, it creates a plethora of rapid successive emotions, positive, energetic and flowing with the so called life. This belief pulls you away from drudgery, challenges you to think different and forces you to stand up for a fight. It mobilizes your inner senses and gives you a match stick to bleakly light your way. And, with that bleak luminosity you will find your track back to reach where you were. It is not a support system that helps you to find your identity, rather it is a caring hand that jus shows you where you need to be and says why you need not be where you are. This belief is not a heavenly one, neither is a blessing. It is a heartfelt wish, an emotional push to the heart that so badly disbelieves in life. I have had this belief in my life work wonders on me. Most times, when I have so badly wanted to let go or call it quits, I realize it is a momentary decision and invariably, this belief pops up to show its head. Still, the disbelief and drudgery that fills my heart is so strong, that I refuse to acknowledge this ray. I still want to cling on to misery, feel miserable, cry and then dry up to wet myself with tears again. As much as we want to stop feeling bad, it is the most comfortable to feel that way and the best thing to do then is to feel pathetic and hurt. In times like this, when you feel like pulling your hair apart, and detest your reflection – practice yourself to think of the belief that you strongly put your heart and soul in. It may not be a comfortable and an easy option, but it is the only one that can being you back to what you should be and not leave you in a sense of despair. Build on a single, strong belief in life. And, nurture it with all positive energy you know of. This shall guide you during times you lose the candle of faith. It shall pull you back to your laid path and not let you roam endlessly in worlds of thoughts. It will teach you to live a life, and not just exist it. To some, this belief may be God. To some, it may be a divine person or a guru. And, to some others it may be a belief on someone. To me, it is a soul that wants me smiling as well always. Times when my tears choke my speech, the belief that there is soul somewhere breathing, hoping you are smiling this instant and hoping you are not choking this manner – puts me back on track. Makes me feel on top of my world. Teaches me to smile at every instant. Takes me on a dream journey every time I fall. Pushes me down sometimes, but is always a person to whom I can go and tell – you pushed me down, and now please pull me up. And believe me, this person will actually smile, say I am not sorry – but I love you and pull you up. That’s what life needs. A fight, a tear, a smile and a bigger expression of love through a smile!!

Thank You!

With waves lapping at my feet, breeze tearing apart my locks, sands playing around my toes I was immersed in whiffing at the seaside air when I noticed a crab drifting away from the waves to the dunes nearby. Minutes later, I saw the wave move towards the crab's dune. The crab seemed to be in a conversation with the wave. Constantly lapping, and caressing each other. Seemed so beautiful. So Complete. And that set me thinking....What follows is a train of thoughts that took over me. Since then, I became two personalities - One thinking. Another Observing the Thinking One.

As much as i am proud, I am afraid of thinking of you, or talking to you much now days. Probably, it is because you have grown so much, that I am finding it difficult to address you easily. For the kind of knowledge, ability you possess, you ought to be living a better life. If this is what you feel, try and find who does not look at a better life. Everyone in the world wants a better life. A better job, a better salary, a better phone, a better wallet, a better house. These are all the "better's" we address in life. There are some other the not addressed better's. Lets look at some of them now. A better life partner, A better mother, A better family, A better self, A better life with a better society. These become some of the better's that you do not really voice out. Here I take the time to address them all, call them all, and to tell them all - that I needed a better in these aspects of life. A better way of living -by acknowledging the self. Thank You.


Life has shown me some beautiful pathways, quite rugged and rocky, but certainly smooth enough to protect my feet. Else, in places where it could not protect my feet, it gave me slippers to walk on, or pointed towards a softer moss to step up on. To show my gratitude, to say a heartfelt thanks to you, to make sure you reach the bottom of the heart and pull a strand of muscle from there, that stretches itself in gratitude to this life, that has made you what you are today, that has shown you to be what you are. Here I take the time to thank that life, that has made me walk safe amidst all slush and dirt.A safe journey, with enough bruises, that would heal in a day. Thank you.

My being so far, has been mostly good, and partly not so good. There are so many out there, whose beings have been partly so good, and mostly bad. I look upon all of them as teachers, as seniors in life - who have experienced something that I have not, and I probably would never do so. Let me take the time to think of one of them today, recall the life's lesson I learn there, and the trial that senior faced, that i would not or did not face yet. Let me dedicate a minute to that misery that passed that soul and the ripples it caused. Most importantly, let me make a constant and enduring effort to realize the way the system of life jumped back to normalcy and created harmony. Here I take the time to reach out to the past, to embrace it and to look at it as a memory. A friend's milestone to walk back to, sit for a while and dust and walk from on. Thank you.

When my being came into existence, I had no worries to carry. No baggage's to hold, except the tiny frail body and lots of dreams - unmeasurable, but priceless. As much as I grew aged, The force that was sent within to pursue never let a wrinkle pass by. It evolved into what it could, took what it should and became a sense of being within. That invisible source was never called for, never told to go through any course of education because all the while it never deviated from its path of serving me. Here I take the time to salute that spirit within, the powerful, mighty ray that runs through me and has made me to what i should be today. Thank You.

The list of such thankful notes shall extend till my being knows to think. To think, to reason, to analyse and to take decisions, to cry, to laugh, to feel, to smile, to hug, to kiss, to express, to be able to make love, give affection, show care, feel compassion - and above all, to live and not exist - there is a last person to thank a person. My Self. To that wonderful and passionate creature that finds happiness, joy and shares peace, looks at mistakes with the eye of a baby and immediately gets up and smiles at it . To that creation of Almighty - Thank you.

A Cup of Chai

Are you a chai freak? Or, do you think chai is just the best way to feel better? If yes, join the wagon.

Sipping in to a Brooke bond tea cup ( slighty over kadak, bcos of the tea bag), i feel relaxed and unwinded to blog. The last few days have been quite hectic mentally, and draining. It is not a new phenomena in me to feel low and then feel better - but it is today that I really feel the endurance of the cup of chai.

Everyone needs their own cup of chai. it can be a cup of brooke bond, or a hug from a friend, or a SMS that charges you up. Mine was a SMS from a friend, that said - that my friend will charge me up - like glucose. I dont know if this sounds funny, but it sure sounded better after a tiresome day.

We all need our time, to work, to sit, to think and to live. Lets all plan one thing at a time - take up one a day, and live our lives, with constant cups in between!

And then you know what happened.......!

I was bugged, bored and single. Yes, in that order. I wanted to always understand how it happens, at what time, and with what level of intensity. Thts the story of this blog - and then you know what happened?

Two weeks back, I sent across a SMS to a whole lot of my friends. This was the message - "And then you know what happened". This blog is about the varied reactions, replies, actions, apprehensions, assumptions that took place after this message was sent.

17.45
I send as many as 30 messages.

17.47
A couple of replies from people - asking who is this? (I changed my number recently, so people dont know). Of course, i replied with a mini bio-data. Then, people asked, what happened?

17.55
What the hell happened da? Office'la problem'a? - My college mate

17.56
Hey, Accident?? Why do u take your vehicle and go?? - One other college mate

18:00
Kalyanama? wow ! eppo da - A very imaginative school mate~~

18.11
Hey Worst - enna de?? - a colleague now!

18.25
I am sorry, I dont get you - What are you talking about - a colleague, this time a guy - very courteous indeed!! :-)

18.27
And they lived happily ever after :-) - My cousin brother, who thinks he is Aseop and writes fables

18.28
I dont need to know now. U can buzz me aboutit after 3 hours. Entering a movie hall - A not-s o nice good friend!!

18.30
Enna? Blog crazy, please - can we talk something else? - A lovely friend, who reads my mind!

18. 32
One of those, who just recognised me with my new number - asks - "After what? After you changed your number?

And there this blog stood for 10 months. Today when I was revisitng my blog, I thought why not publish this post finally. It may change to send te same SMS today to friends, because by now people have mostly changed around, and no one really would mind if i do this today. Yet - it is amazing to note somethings in life. And so is this! Felt nice to read this back today, after 10 months!!